Now I'm writing in Swedish again, mostly to piss off all the sleazy crashdiet fans from Spain.
The year was 1994, the flags and ”hängpungarna” (can’t think of the word) were flying high.
Kurt Cobain was dead and Isak was born. The following years Isak would come to live in a concentration camp outside of Nyköping, by the name of “Bärbo”.
All the days were the same, he had to struggle to get food on the table, fight with roosters and build tree houses with his older brother Axel.
The years passed and when Isak was three years old he and his family moved to a ghetto called Arnö because his mother had something inside her tummy.
Some time passed and soon it was time for the thing to come out from mum. It became apparent that she had harboured an Alien inside her stomach and it was red and liked to scream. The red thing would come to be known as Anna.
The years rolled by and so did Isak.
Now Isak was six full years and he was ready for what was known as School. Isak had never fully understood what school really was, but he looked forward to it.
The first day at school Isak (without succeeding) tried to make friends. With his pokémon cards in a firm grip he went up to the first best kid and started to talk. What he didn’t know was that the child he talked to would come to be one of his best friends!
School wouldn’t be an easy thing for Isak. He was cast out by the large six-graders who mostly saw him as a mad rancor monster from Star Wars.
And he wasn’t accepted by the kids his age either.
- What was wrong with Isak, you must be wondering now? And the truth is that there wasn’t anything really wrong with Isak. He liked his parents, liked to sing and to play marble. He was probably like most kids his age, almost anyway.
Everything ended with a ”crisis talk”. (What that meant Isak didn’t quite understand then, but he’d come to understand it in time).
After the crisis talk Isak made friends. He was happy, but a child of eight is very easily influenced by what is shown on MTV. Isak became a flippin floppin hip-hoper. And a hip-hoper who’s not giving his teacher grief isn’t a real hip-hoper!
The fact is that Isak was so cocky towards his teacher that he had to change schools at the age of nine. He would also move out from the concrete to the city. He would become a man! (Which he also failed at).
Isak had to change to a school called ”Västra Skolan”. That school did a lot for Isak. He threw away his hip-hop clothes, started listening to F1, a lot of sleaze, but he never became a man because Isak still liked his parents (a bit anyway) and to sing, but to play marble wasn’t much to his liking anymore.
“It’s not suitable when you’re in the “mellanstadiet” (classes 4 - 6) he used to say and he was probably right when it all comes down to it.
So what more is there to tell now?
Well, Isak started to take an interest in girls but if they were as interested in him he wasn’t sure of.
Love is difficult damn it even if you’re in primary school and have longer hair than your sister.
Isak shed a tear or two over some girl but later came to the conclusion that it was cooler not to have a girlfriend and to spend time with your friends instead. But the days passed and Isak had more girlfriends than Björn Söders (and that is a fucking understatement).
Isak wasn’t quite happy and decided to be single, which he also failed at. (Now you’re probably sitting there thinking “Wow what a lot he fails at" and the fact is that Isak actually has failed at a lot of things during his life).
He got himself a girl 100 km’s away and as far as I know no long-distance relationships last (except in the movies).
For a few months he went back and forth to our dear capitol Stockholm. Until he was dumped. There came water from Isak’s eyes. But he didn’t give a shit.